Even though you came back, I'm still glad I'm your friend and hope I'll continue to be! I still wanna help you, so talk to me about anything you'd like :)
uhhh i really think you should seek actual professional help. sure we can comfort you and stuff but a professional therapist will help you a hella lot more than we can.
@ilovecats2018 tbh maybe nothing shit js needs to be said sometimes but don't catch me putting words in their mouth (i have random scattered thoughts and i do a lot of shit without drive, but i'm special )
I personally don't have advice myself because I do the same thing. But I HAVE heard pickypads help its pretty much hotglue with beads inside you can either buy them or make them at home !! (you just pick the beads out to recreate that satisfying feeling of picking) and technically they're re-usable bc you can just melt the glue back down and put the beads back