My utter writing talent

[spamburger]

I'm bored, so I decided I'd put down my extra short story garbage I wrote like a year ago, the 11 is because this is part of a series of work, and I found it very amusing to write around 17 stories about random things

If this topic is ignored, I shall promptly delete my account

(11)The Farmer's Daughter

The farmer was a large, bulky man of some seventy-four inches.
His hands were ten inches long, and six inches wide, and he could hoe a whole field in the blink of an eye. His daughter was similar to him. She was some seventy inches, her hands were nine inches long, five inches wide, and she could consume an entire carrot in the munch of a mouth. They got along well until one fateful day when his hands fell off. This wasn't particularly interesting, besides the fact that he could not click them back on as usual. He carried them inside, and he showed them to his daughter.
"Paw," she said, "can't ya' jus' click 'em back on agen?"
"No dearie, no can do. Listen 'ere."
There was a dreadful crunch as he attempted to stick his hands back in place. The farmer's daughter was appalled. Now her paw couldn't hoe the fields, couldn't read her bedtime stories. So she had to work on her own, and this solitary work was grueling. Her paw was not the same as usual, and he often sobbed in devastation at being unable to work the land any longer.
One day, while she hoed the fields (it took her two blinks of an eye), she saw a strange mystic bottle, casually sitting in the shade. The farmer's daughter squinted her eyes, and read.
"The specialty glue, gets all parts moving" so she decided her paw would be fixed, and she raced home, where her father lay, stretched out on a sofa.
"Paw!" she yelped, "I found a mystic bottle 'ere!" Her father stood up, quickly, his eyes full of confusion and disappointment.
"Dag nab it, girl. You weren't to ever find that bottle."
"You don' wanna be well, paw?"
"Heck no! I hate them fields!"
"well, Paw, I gotta fix you up!"
"No sirree! I aint gonna go back to workin' the land, nor nothing lak that. No sirree!"
His daughter paid no heed to his definite answers, and grabbed the glue. Her paw began to run, and they raced about the house, until he quit the house, ran into the fields, and he churned up the land quicker than he ever hoed it.
From then on, the farmer's daughter chased him out into the fields every day, and all was well again.

[Snoopy]

Ain't ignored CUZ I MESSAGED HERE AND IM THE FIRST COMMENT

[Borat]

this immaculate poetry is the greatest piece of writing that has ever blessed my eyes, your raw literary talent blows any other poet or writer out of the water after reading this my life has taken a turn for the better, it seems that any writing you out out is the best piece of pure literary technique i have EVER seen with my eyes, your writing does not fail, this piece of fiction is so IMMACULATE i cannot express it with text alone i cannot describe the glory of your literary capability with the functions of my brain, you are da vinci times ten, your writing is so utterly GREAT i had to rub my eyes a whopping 6 times to see if i was reading this MASTERPIECE of human writing correctly your writing talent is amazing i cannot express it enough. Pig2

[spamburger]

@Borat no words can express my gratitude for your praise, each word of kindness bloomed within my heart and multiplied into a thousand more flowers of joy, my eyes teared, drops of happiness creating a lake of pure hope and benevolence to match your comment.
I would run to every person near, shaking them and crying out the sheer amount of joy I am experiencing to them, speaking to their souls, yet they would all explode as my glee is far too much for them to handle.
I will never forget the imprint your kindness left on my warmed heart, glory to pig2