what a third space is, and is not, and just about them in general.

[Yanderemenhera]

a third space is somewhere outside of your home, school or work that you can go to and be around other humans without needing to spend much or any money. an example of this would be a community park or playground, another example commonly used is places like the mall or a concert-
however you'd need to spend some money but depending on the mall or concert you are going to, you might show up with ten dollars and it'd be enough to get into the concert or go to the food court and get ice cream for you and this cute girl in a MCR shirt you're wearing right now you met inside Spencer's.
so basically, a third space is somewhere where you can socialize with other people outside of any mandatory schedual or that'll cost you little to no money. (ideally, it should be free but I think spending like a max of $20 isn't the end of the word if you're enjoying yourself, like if you're an adult and you pay a bit to get inside of a club and go dancing and socialize with people you think are cool.)

a third space isn't your school. even if you can talk to someone for a few minutes before class, it's still a very structured environment and the focus isn't socialization, it's education.

a third space isn't a therapy office, some adult being paid $100+ to hear you complain about school or your parents for 30 minutes isn't your friend, from my experience, even if they are actually nice you are their client and not like their own kid so their attachment to you ends at them giving you advice. not to say they don't care, it's like how you might care about someone you are talking to at your own job or something, but there's not the same level of intamacy or relationship there'd be if they were a friend or a family member and not some customer. and that's not to even touch on the shitty one's who hate people and their job but do it because they can make a fuck-ton of money from that.

a third space isn't your job, like even if you talk and hang out in the break room, you are still working with them and the only reason why you know each other is because you require funds to not be a homeless begged or live with your parents, so you likely spend more time working than actually socializing.

a third space isn't social media, doom scrolling tik tok isn't a third space and if you think it counts, I have no idea how you're reading this message.

while it isn't ideal, and shouldn't be done unless you have literally nowhere else to go, you could view things like discord servers as third spaces and especially if you do things like face-to-face video calls, you're getting some level of socialization in. not to say discord and platforms like it are bad in this context, it's just they shouldn't be considered a third space unless you yourself for whatever reason have no other option, talking to people online isn't the same as being at a community center and being with someone you can touch and interact with physically and considering online spaces as third spaces can be kind of dangerous to actual physical spaces because your average anxious gen z or older gen alpha kid, tend to view online spaces as a replacement for actually going out and doing things because there's a lot less friction with people online, you can just join a server full of people who like the same things you do and if you have a disagreement, you don't have to work it out and you likely won't, you'll just block people you dislike and you can also join another server and there's no real reprocutions unless we're talking something like doxxing. (but that's getting into illegal stuff unrelated to this particular topic)

in real life situations, if you and someone else get into a disagreement over something at the local skate park like who gets to go use the new little skating ramp the city just put in first, you need to actually talk it out and come to a compromize because you can't just block the other person, hence the friction, so this is one of the most common reasons younger people will spend all their time online when they do have the ability to go somewhere, even if it's like the library by their house they can walk to whenever they want. this is not including teenagers who literally have nothing for them like if their area is extremely rural and there's no other kids their age, or if the teenager isn't allowed to have friends or leave the house by the way, that's not whom I am speaking of, I'm talking about kids who do actually have third spaces within walking distance of their house and they just choose to spend all day on discord instead because they are technically socializing and they are too lazy or too anxious to actually try to form connections with people in real life.

what you yourself can do if you'd like to go to a third space if you aren't already going to one regularly is:
try to find an area within walking distance of your home, a few common one's a lot of towns or cities have are things like libraries which usually have a lot of things you can do for free like if they host a free movie night every Saturday where you can just go in and watch a movie and chit chat with people about it or maybe they do a board game night where they stay open to 11pm and you can go in and play chess with someone you think is cool.

or a public park where you can go color on the sidewalk with some chalk and invite people to join you.

or you could go to the local basket ball hoop and play with some people.

or maybe do pickle ball if you live in a nicer area.

depending on the season, you could go to a community pool too.

and I could go on, but seriously, if you are able to drive or walk somewhere, just see what's in your area and do it.

and if you yourself are in a situation where online spaces are your only option, try to find small, friendly communites over larger ones so you can actually form a close connection with several people instead of a back and forth with 100's of people you'll never actually be able to form a connection with. getting on a call with people can also help you feel less lonely and help you feel more connected to them, like seriously, just hearing someone talk to you can feel amazing when you're very lonely.

[Yanderemenhera]

I feel like this should be obvious but at the same time like I should mention it, but please use online safety and don't like, give out your home address, or where you go to school or work at

[macncheese.]

Im too illiterate to read ts can some1 summarise?

[xenthy]

@macncheese. basically a place you go to socialize that costs little to no money. usially a park or smth else. (from what i

[UnpaidIntern]

@macncheese.

Summary:

A third space is somewhere outside home, school, or work where you socialize with others irl without structure and without it being costly.

A third space isn't:

• Your school
• A therapy office
• Your job
• Social media or online spaces.

Online spaces shouldn't be used as a replacement for a third space because being able to be around that person physically is important for socialization, but you use them as a third space if you don't have anywhere else.